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> Mature Chat, Anything you need of your mind post here
 Posted: Aug 27 2017, 01:22 AM
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Think of this topic as daily chat, but for more serious topics.

Depression? Family troubles? Existential crisis? Unrequited love life? Or even just a general need to vent, feel free to post it here.

Additionally, if there is anything you don't feel comfortable posting to the public but still feel like you need someone to talk to please feel free to message me.

Remember this is counted as Mature Discussion so please keep spam and stuff to a minimum, as such things will be weighed more heavily here.

I know our forum is mostly dead, but I feel like something like this could be very beneficial, personally I myself have found myself coming on here less and less because of issues such as depression and I think rather than keep myself away from TEB which has always been like a second family to me, I should post about stuff that troubles me and also provide a place for others to do the same if they feel a need to. http://i.imgur.com/aJs9cWS.png

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Koji
 Posted: Aug 27 2017, 08:59 PM
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This is a good idea! I agree, and sometimes coming on here just helped me when I felt upset.

I'm gonna vent just a little bit and put it in a spoiler!

so in January my mom was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's, and that really helps get answers as to why she had a huge downward spiral starting a few years ago. And while it's good to have answers, I think I've just had a really hard time coming to terms with it? I was all by myself in my internship when I was told and of course my roommates, try as they might, couldn't really help me. My mom is my rock and I've always known I will eventually lose her but having to deal with it right now has been so hard and I don't think I really understand how to process it? With my internship I really didn't have time to think about it and now with my career starting next week, I still think about it and it's just tough. I don't know I'm rambling!

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 Posted: Aug 27 2017, 10:34 PM
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QUOTE (Koji @ Aug 27 2017, 09:59 PM)
This is a good idea! I agree, and sometimes coming on here just helped me when I felt upset.

I'm gonna vent just a little bit and put it in a spoiler!

so in January my mom was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's, and that really helps get answers as to why she had a huge downward spiral starting a few years ago. And while it's good to have answers, I think I've just had a really hard time coming to terms with it? I was all by myself in my internship when I was told and of course my roommates, try as they might, couldn't really help me. My mom is my rock and I've always known I will eventually lose her but having to deal with it right now has been so hard and I don't think I really understand how to process it? With my internship I really didn't have time to think about it and now with my career starting next week, I still think about it and it's just tough. I don't know I'm rambling!


Koji:
That is definitely rough. We all have our rocks and our people that support us. For me it's my grand-mom and her health has been getting worse within the past years and it's hard to think about. She lives out of state too, so I hardly ever see her. Like you, I've definitely had a hard time processing it.

Sounds like you've been busy between your internship and career but I hope you find time to deal with the situation and cope with it, if only a little bit. Sounds like you and your mom will both need to be rocks for each other in this situation.


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Ryo Zonbolt
 Posted: Aug 30 2017, 08:47 PM
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Well, I'm already 18, and still no girlfriend( i don't care really) but my family is starting to think i'm gay becuz that, and that's bulshit >:c

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 Posted: Aug 31 2017, 04:00 AM
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QUOTE (Ryo Zonbolt @ Aug 30 2017, 09:47 PM, {5785|162313} )
Well, I'm already 18, and still no girlfriend( i don't care really) but my family is starting to think i'm gay becuz that, and that's bulshit >:c


I've had to go through this several times, I've even had a few girlfriends over the years but anytime I'm single for more than a few months I get asked this question and I'm just like c'mon really http://i686.photobucket.com/albums/vv224/Sqawl/Fire%20Emblem/knoll-distraught.png

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 Posted: Aug 31 2017, 12:06 PM
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I've never dated anyone, which led to a really awkward conversation with my boss last week; she just automatically assumed I knew what going on a first date felt like.

Anyway...

I'm in financial trouble right now. I just wiped out my savings to pay for my college courses, and in order to continue to pay out-of-pocket I'm going to have to save over $500 a month. ...On top of my $400 student loan payments and $100+ in other bills. This means that every cent I make will have to go towards an expense, and $10 an hour doesn't cover much. The only blessing is that I'm still living at home and don't have to worry about rent.

...I also just found out that I didn't get the job I interviewed for. Figures I'd get rejected when I need a better position more than ever.

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QUOTE (Duchess of Freege @ Jun 13 2013, 08:41 PM)
Eh, I used to be afraid of not finding love. Then I just resigned myself to loneliness and started lusting after much older men.

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 Posted: Aug 31 2017, 01:08 PM
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QUOTE (Duchess of Friege @ Aug 31 2017, 01:06 PM)
I've never dated anyone, which led to a really awkward conversation with my boss last week; she just automatically assumed I knew what going on a first date felt like.

Anyway...

I'm in financial trouble right now. I just wiped out my savings to pay for my college courses, and in order to continue to pay out-of-pocket I'm going to have to save over $500 a month. ...On top of my $400 student loan payments and $100+ in other bills. This means that every cent I make will have to go towards an expense, and $10 an hour doesn't cover much. The only blessing is that I'm still living at home and don't have to worry about rent.

...I also just found out that I didn't get the job I interviewed for. Figures I'd get rejected when I need a better position more than ever.


Ouch, financial problems are the worst. I only went to college for a year and it was an absolute nightmare trying to pay for it. I still owe $3,000 in debt and trying to pay it off while paying other bills has been a nightmare X_x

Good luck though Duchess, sounds like it might be difficult finding a way to make enough money but I'm sure you'll persevere http://i.imgur.com/aJs9cWS.png

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Ryo Zonbolt
 Posted: Sep 4 2017, 07:51 PM
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QUOTE (Duchess of Friege @ Aug 31 2017, 01:06 PM)
I've never dated anyone, which led to a really awkward conversation with my boss last week; she just automatically assumed I knew what going on a first date felt like.

Anyway...

I'm in financial trouble right now. I just wiped out my savings to pay for my college courses, and in order to continue to pay out-of-pocket I'm going to have to save over $500 a month. ...On top of my $400 student loan payments and $100+ in other bills. This means that every cent I make will have to go towards an expense, and $10 an hour doesn't cover much. The only blessing is that I'm still living at home and don't have to worry about rent.

...I also just found out that I didn't get the job I interviewed for. Figures I'd get rejected when I need a better position more than ever.


I can only wish you to be strong! And become even more strong after every trial the life puts you.

I've been messing around with faia emburem heroes, and 80 orbs for nothing >:c not a single seth in sacred stones banner, and i saved 100 orbs for the cyl brave heroes banner and nothing... This SUCKS!



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 Posted: Sep 5 2017, 03:03 PM
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QUOTE (Ryo Zonbolt @ Sep 4 2017, 08:51 PM)
QUOTE (Duchess of Friege @ Aug 31 2017, 01:06 PM)
I've never dated anyone, which led to a really awkward conversation with my boss last week; she just automatically assumed I knew what going on a first date felt like.

Anyway...

I'm in financial trouble right now. I just wiped out my savings to pay for my college courses, and in order to continue to pay out-of-pocket I'm going to have to save over $500 a month. ...On top of my $400 student loan payments and $100+ in other bills. This means that every cent I make will have to go towards an expense, and $10 an hour doesn't cover much. The only blessing is that I'm still living at home and don't have to worry about rent.

...I also just found out that I didn't get the job I interviewed for. Figures I'd get rejected when I need a better position more than ever.


I can only wish you to be strong! And become even more strong after every trial the life puts you.

I've been messing around with faia emburem heroes, and 80 orbs for nothing >:c not a single seth in sacred stones banner, and i saved 100 orbs for the cyl brave heroes banner and nothing... This SUCKS!


This chat is generally supposed to be for more mature and heavy topics. Unlike daily chat, the idea is to post less about daily happenings and instead post about mature topics that are perhaps hard to discuss on any other spot in the forum. (IE. lost love ones, being involved in a natural disaster, suffering through depression etc.)

Although I'm sure you could make an argument for the emotional trauma that comes from blowing an obnoxious amount of orbs in FE: heroes, I would prefer you discuss it in either the Daily chat or in the FE: heroes forum.

Please and thank you http://i.imgur.com/aJs9cWS.png

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Ryo Zonbolt
 Posted: Sep 5 2017, 05:54 PM
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QUOTE (Ezra @ Sep 5 2017, 04:03 PM)
QUOTE (Ryo Zonbolt @ Sep 4 2017, 08:51 PM)
QUOTE (Duchess of Friege @ Aug 31 2017, 01:06 PM)
I've never dated anyone, which led to a really awkward conversation with my boss last week; she just automatically assumed I knew what going on a first date felt like.

Anyway...

I'm in financial trouble right now. I just wiped out my savings to pay for my college courses, and in order to continue to pay out-of-pocket I'm going to have to save over $500 a month. ...On top of my $400 student loan payments and $100+ in other bills. This means that every cent I make will have to go towards an expense, and $10 an hour doesn't cover much. The only blessing is that I'm still living at home and don't have to worry about rent.

...I also just found out that I didn't get the job I interviewed for. Figures I'd get rejected when I need a better position more than ever.


I can only wish you to be strong! And become even more strong after every trial the life puts you.

I've been messing around with faia emburem heroes, and 80 orbs for nothing >:c not a single seth in sacred stones banner, and i saved 100 orbs for the cyl brave heroes banner and nothing... This SUCKS!


This chat is generally supposed to be for more mature and heavy topics. Unlike daily chat, the idea is to post less about daily happenings and instead post about mature topics that are perhaps hard to discuss on any other spot in the forum. (IE. lost love ones, being involved in a natural disaster, suffering through depression etc.)

Although I'm sure you could make an argument for the emotional trauma that comes from blowing an obnoxious amount of orbs in FE: heroes, I would prefer you discuss it in either the Daily chat or in the FE: heroes forum.

Please and thank you http://i.imgur.com/aJs9cWS.png


Sorry, Ezra i won't do it again

Haven't you been tired lately? I don't know but after the summer finished y started to feel tired and i don't think i'm doing something wrong, my routine is nearly the same from monday to friday. I rest a little bit at night, i usually go to bed at 21:00 to wake up at 4:30, i'm having breakfast,lunch and dinner, really don't know what's going on.

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 Posted: Sep 6 2017, 02:36 PM
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Hey guys. I guess I'm back a little or something.

So I suppose I'll have a little vent, then:
So I've been in a bit of a funk recently, and I can't really put my finger on why. I've just begun my second year in law school after a summer that could have gone much better regarding law-related employment, in that I could have found some. Instead, I ended up throwing pallets for a living (yeah, that's a job), and attempting to collaborate with an old professor of mine on an article for a journal. I really shouldn't complain; I got to spend time with my girlfriend, as opposed to the normal, and now resumed, status of us being a long distance apart and not really talking all that much. But the summer felt entirely unfulfilling; almost like I was wasting time, except when I was hanging out with some friends I have in that area. But now I'm back in law school, and just generally kind of bummed about most things with no real justification. Recently, my grandfather on my mom's side was diagnosed with stage 4 prostate cancer, which I presume would make most people feel very sad. Instead, it just mostly makes me feel pissed, because I haven't managed to see him in a very long time and now it feels like some time limit is being imposed upon me. But I'm experiencing the whole thing in my usual detached and cold manner. Classes are going well, and are even pretty interesting. I've found out that because of a class I'm taking there's a chance that I'll get an all-expense paid trip to Germany. Financially I'm doing a lot better than I potentially could be. I'm on track to become a lawyer in a few years, and very quickly be in a position to rake in large amounts of money while doing work that genuinely interests me. I really can't figure out what's bugging me. Which is in itself annoying.

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 Posted: Sep 7 2017, 07:44 PM
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QUOTE (soadfa @ Sep 6 2017, 03:36 PM)
Hey guys. I guess I'm back a little or something.

So I suppose I'll have a little vent, then:
So I've been in a bit of a funk recently, and I can't really put my finger on why. I've just begun my second year in law school after a summer that could have gone much better regarding law-related employment, in that I could have found some. Instead, I ended up throwing pallets for a living (yeah, that's a job), and attempting to collaborate with an old professor of mine on an article for a journal. I really shouldn't complain; I got to spend time with my girlfriend, as opposed to the normal, and now resumed, status of us being a long distance apart and not really talking all that much. But the summer felt entirely unfulfilling; almost like I was wasting time, except when I was hanging out with some friends I have in that area. But now I'm back in law school, and just generally kind of bummed about most things with no real justification. Recently, my grandfather on my mom's side was diagnosed with stage 4 prostate cancer, which I presume would make most people feel very sad. Instead, it just mostly makes me feel pissed, because I haven't managed to see him in a very long time and now it feels like some time limit is being imposed upon me. But I'm experiencing the whole thing in my usual detached and cold manner. Classes are going well, and are even pretty interesting. I've found out that because of a class I'm taking there's a chance that I'll get an all-expense paid trip to Germany. Financially I'm doing a lot better than I potentially could be. I'm on track to become a lawyer in a few years, and very quickly be in a position to rake in large amounts of money while doing work that genuinely interests me. I really can't figure out what's bugging me. Which is in itself annoying.


Soadfa

Sounds like you're in some sort of mental/emotional rut. Sucks that you're not sure what's causing it but I guess sometimes these things happen without any real explanation.
Well if there is a reason why hopefully you figure it out, but other than that hopefully time fixes your funk and general annoyance.


Something interested happened the other day. I had a friend the other day who I burned bridges with about four years ago comment on the same status as me on Facebook. I don't wanna go into full details, but basically I had changed my stance on something that escalated to a toxic friendship that was mostly my fault for occurring. Seeing that I commented on the status with a different opinion than the one I chanted years ago they called me out on it and I basically apologized and typed up a good paragraph explaining myself and profusely apologizing for being a prick years ago.

Flash forward a few weeks and they message me saying they thanked me for apologizing and not for expecting them to accept the apology, and while we're obviously not super close friends again we were able to bury the hatchet and we're friends on facebook again.

It's actually hard to put into words how important this was to me, because this wasn't the only friend I was a jerk too. Several years ago in 2014 I was suffering severe depression and masked it with anger, effectively burning bridges with those around me. So naturally a large portion of my real life friends stopped talking to me and my current gf of 3 years left me at the time. The depression mixed with losing so many friends because of my actions has haunted me for a LONG time and coping with it has been a challenge.

Now, I'm friends or acquaintances again with roughly 90% of the people I pushed away. Naturally that gf isn't one of them, but just having so many friends forgive me and accept me has helped recently I'm just gonna try and be more open with my emotions from now on so that something like that doesn't happen again.

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 Posted: Sep 14 2017, 08:00 AM
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So...the drama continues.

My mother finally noticed that my job is slowly killing me, so she suggested I go back to being a shelver; I would actually be making more money due to not being docked for insurance, and I'd be doing something I enjoyed. I was actually considering doing it until I overheard my father arguing with my mother about it - namely, that I'd be so happy shelving that I'd still be leeching off of them ten years later (not exactly the words he used, but the sentiment was there). I was happy shelving before; the reason I left was because I didn't want to be a shelver forever. I'm insulted that he thinks so little of me, and I'm really not sure how to deal with this because he doesn't even know I overheard what he said.

Then I realized I would never be happy as a shelver anymore, because that means I'd be working alongside my brother. Everyone loves him; he's kind, helpful, and a really hard worker...just like I used to be. My toxic job has completely changed my personality, and I'm afraid if I go back everyone won't like me anymore - and even if it's not true, I'll still think it's true. I've felt second-best to my brother for most of my life, even though he's literally the best friend I've ever had; I don't want my doubts to turn into full-blown resentment and destroy that friendship. But the only choice I seem to have is to stay in a job that might literally end up killing me.

So...yeah. I'm a psychological mess right now.

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QUOTE (Duchess of Freege @ Jun 13 2013, 08:41 PM)
Eh, I used to be afraid of not finding love. Then I just resigned myself to loneliness and started lusting after much older men.

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 Posted: Sep 14 2017, 01:05 PM
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QUOTE (Duchess of Friege @ Sep 14 2017, 09:00 AM)
So...the drama continues.

My mother finally noticed that my job is slowly killing me, so she suggested I go back to being a shelver; I would actually be making more money due to not being docked for insurance, and I'd be doing something I enjoyed. I was actually considering doing it until I overheard my father arguing with my mother about it - namely, that I'd be so happy shelving that I'd still be leeching off of them ten years later (not exactly the words he used, but the sentiment was there). I was happy shelving before; the reason I left was because I didn't want to be a shelver forever. I'm insulted that he thinks so little of me, and I'm really not sure how to deal with this because he doesn't even know I overheard what he said.

Then I realized I would never be happy as a shelver anymore, because that means I'd be working alongside my brother. Everyone loves him; he's kind, helpful, and a really hard worker...just like I used to be. My toxic job has completely changed my personality, and I'm afraid if I go back everyone won't like me anymore - and even if it's not true, I'll still think it's true. I've felt second-best to my brother for most of my life, even though he's literally the best friend I've ever had; I don't want my doubts to turn into full-blown resentment and destroy that friendship. But the only choice I seem to have is to stay in a job that might literally end up killing me.

So...yeah. I'm a psychological mess right now.


Duchess

That's really rough, I'm still having trouble in the job front myself. I somewhat enjoy my current job but they still haven't promoted me so I feel like I'm kind of at a dead-end job after working here for more than a year and being a busser. Especially because someone younger, same position and with less work-experience and less time at the company just got promoted to supervisor.

I also haven't heard back from the other place I applied for, but I had an interview a few days ago so fingers crossed.

I'm sorry you feel second best Duchess and have such a difficult job, but you're an amazing and wonderful person. I hope you find a job that produces less psychological warfare. Even if it takes time I'll be rooting for both of us to find either a better position or job in general. In the meantime I'm proud of you for sticking it out as long as you have and hope you can find ways to vent the toxic environment that surrounds you.


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 Posted: Sep 15 2017, 04:05 PM
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Been feeling like I'm on the edge of depression with me fucking up my school and girl troubles. Also my anger management have been a huge struggle lately for the first time in years. So I'm jumping between like fucked and ok.

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